"Three steps forward, two steps back." You heard it, right? That's what it's like for me lately. A day comes when I feel so great, strong, and alert that I get up and take a walk. But then I pay for it the day after, big time. On top of that, I struggle with painful gout, the "rich man's disease." The sad thing is that I never struggled with gout before the stroke, and I've never been rich in the traditional sense. Most likely, because of the trauma and the drugs, I can't shake the gout now. I'm doing all sorts of research to eliminate high purine and acidic foods to make my diet more alkaline. Every meal I have is full of so-called superfoods. In fact, it's kind of fun to try to come up with tasty recipes, and eat what I never would have tried a few months before, either because of unfamiliarity or the expense. But I've learned the hard way, it's better to pay a dollar or two more, and live.
One therapist gave me an exercise picking up tiny beans with my left hand, a demoralizingly impossible task at the time. She even told me that I wouldn't be able to do it for a number of weeks. She said it was like my baby girl learning to use her hands. At first, my daughter would use her entire hand, clutching something with an awkward, primitive fist. Now, she is using her little fingers with dexterity and grace. Likewise, I need to relearn using my left hand. It is so weak that I would consider it a very good day, indeed, if I would have a baby's-like control again. Baby steps.
One of the reasons I believe God doesn't heal me instantly is because he wants to do the most difficult work of the inner heart. Unfortunately, this type of work always takes time. Character, patience, compassion, and perseverance cannot be learned in a 2-hour seminar, but rather over years. Baby steps. If that's what it takes, then I'm learning to walk again.
How about you? Are you facing a marathon, an uphill climb, an impossible task? I believe there is an old Chinese proverb that says, even a great mountain can be removed one spoonful at a time. Don't give up. Come, take a walk with me. Three steps forward and two steps back is still, after all, a gain of one.
"...and Enoch walked with God." - Gen 5:24