It’s strange. No one asks me the obvious, “What do you do all day long?” Perhaps they think it, but are afraid to ask. I remember one time, a bunch of people came over for dinner and there must have been 3 minutes of awkward silence, just looking at me, not knowing what to say. I figure that people probably have questions, but don’t want to offend.
If you’ve ever wondered what stroke victims do, I can tell you what I do. Honestly, I spend most of my time waiting. Yep, waiting. It’s enough to drive one crazy! People ask about therapy. Sure there’s therapy. There’s passive therapies like massage, acupuncture, TENS, and Electric Stim. Then there’s active therapies like exercises, walking, lifting weights, and stretches. But really, in between and through all that therapy, I’m really just waiting (see Psalm 127:1). Waiting for my miraculous, God-given brain to make new connections with my Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes (as the song goes).
I just finished a 4.5 day fast; yes, 112 hours of not eating. This, from a person who is more used to “living to eat,” than “eating to live.” I did this in a desperate attempt to break through a blood sugar plateau. If you’ve been reading along, you know that I’ve been going extremely low carb in an effort to lower my blood sugar. Over the last year or so, my A1C has gone from 12.5 to 10.3 to 9.0, all while titrating my insulin. These last 3 months, I’ve gone almost completely without insulin. Unfortunately, as a result, my numbers went up a little bit. So since my low carb and intermittent fasting without drugs did not produce the numbers I wanted, I decided to try something more drastic. Instead of the typical 18, 24, or even 36 hour fast, I tried to pull an extended one that lasted 111.5 hours. Thank God, I actually made it. In almost 5 days, I didn’t eat a thing except for 3 macadamia nuts and 2 cups of bone broth (these things are allowed in Dr. Fung’s book on fasting.) After Day 2, the hunger pangs were not that bad. I actually could have gone longer, but I promised my dad that I would buy him a celebratory lunch. Believe me, it was good!
As I mentioned, the hardest thing was waiting. I would check my blood sugar often and get so frustrated when with all my efforts, sometimes my blood sugars would actually go up. Now if you don’t suffer from diabetes, you might find that impossible to believe, but this is a common occurrence for some. The explanation is that even when one doesn’t eat, there are still sugars stored up in one’s liver, muscles, and fatty deposits.
The benefit in fasting is that after around Day 2, the body can begin to tap into these sugar stores and use them. Unfortunately, for me, years of taking prescription diabetes drugs had pretty much stuffed my liver so full of sugar that every time I tried to fast, my liver would expel the stored up sugar and my blood glucose levels would actually go up! So what do I do? Wait, wait, and wait some more, just like my stroke recovery. Go to therapy and wait. Exercise and wait. Have acupuncture and wait. Stab at the piano and wait. Walk up-and-down the stairs until I feel like barfing, and wait. You know the cliche: hours into days, into weeks, into months. Lots of waiting. It is only by God’s grace that I am still in my right mind … sort of.
After a lot of prayer, frustration, and more prayer, oh yes, and a lot of NOT eating, finally something happened around the 68th hour of my fast. My blood sugars dropped an average of about 90 points. I’m not normal yet, but what a breakthrough! Finally, some light at the end of the tunnel. Hopefully this next blood test will give me reason to celebrate.
I wish I could say I’m totally healed, but I am still far from it. So guess what that means? … I have to wait some more! Reminds one of Galatians 6:9 doesn’t it? Please pray for me that God will help me to be faithful until we can beat this thing together.
How about you my friend? Are you waiting too? Waiting, praying, hoping, struggling, and waiting some more? Waiting, for the true follower of Jesus, is never passive, but is a relentless, unwavering commitment to doing good; persevering in spite of seeing nothing, no results, and maybe even the opposite. Maybe you’re waiting for that promotion. Maybe you’re still waiting for Mr. or Miss Right. Maybe you’re still waiting for an answer to prayer. Waiting. Commit yourself to doing whatever good you can while waiting!
Let me encourage you like the Apostle Paul encouraged the Galatians. “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Our God promises that you will have a breakthrough if you don’t give up. Believe in the God of the unimaginable (Ephesians 3:20), and the impossible (Luke 1:37). Hang in there and don’t give up. Your breakthrough may be just around the corner.
*If you’re interested, Tim will be addressing the youth with some lessons he learned from the stroke. He will be speaking on the 1st Friday nights of both February and March at Chinese Grace Bible Church, 7:30pm. People of all ages are more than welcome.