I wanted to live on a houseboat. That was the dream, to simplify and minimize life so that we could spend our time ministering in any way, shape, or form we felt God leading us at the time. That, and fishing from my backyard. No worries about paychecks or salaries, or lots of bills, just free to serve. The idea was to sell our house (which had enjoyed good appreciation) and ride out the coming recession floating on the Delta. (Kind of a combination of Tiny House Nation and Marie Kondo, but in a boat.) But the more we thought about it, the more we realized our high energy and rambunctious preschoolers were not seaworthy. Still, the idea of simplifying, downsizing, and focusing on ministry and our rapidly growing children allured me. I wanted to capitalize on the money tied up in the house. I was afraid of depreciation. But where would we live? I was already blessed with a low mortgage payment.
You see, years ago, I felt prompted to take a risk on a humble home in a gentrifying neighborhood in the Bay Area, and through a miraculous series of events, the risk paid off. I was able to purchase our existing home with a large down payment, locking in a low interest rate. We enjoyed the house for 11 years, using it as a base for ministry. We hosted many youth events and overnighters. One youth called my house, “The happiest place on Earth!”
But now things were different. Though I’m older than the average parent of preschoolers, we’re in that special time of life where our kids want to be close to us all the time. We too, wanted to spend as much time with them as possible. The house seemed big, more than we needed currently. But rents were high. What could we do? Now you may not know this, but Elk Grove (the city where we live) has a few affordable income apartments. Since my wife and I were only receiving part-time pay, we figured we could qualify. Looking into it, the main problem was the huge waiting lists. Not only were the apartments sought after by many, but the residents didn’t want to leave. The chances of actually getting an apartment seemed slim to none.
Then the stroke hit. All the stress I was going through professionally, emotionally, and physically, resulted in destroying part of my brain. The MRI showed a dead spot the size of a quarter in the pons area on the right side of my brain, thus paralyzing my left side and taking away all I depended on for my livelihood. I was in no shape to move. At the same time, because of the stroke, we were both not working. Eventually our money would run out. What would we do?
Months passed. Slowly, very slowly, God started to heal me. Suddenly, out of the blue, a woman from a cute affordable housing complex called my wife and said we had been bumped from number 19 on the waiting list to number 2. Furthermore, she told my wife that she did not receive a response from the people ahead of us, thus it seemed very likely that we would have an apartment soon. We thought it was a miracle! Perhaps God was making it possible for us to sell our house and move after all! Still, the job was Herculean. Though it was very difficult for my wife to leave the house she dearly loved, full of cherished memories, we decided we had to give it a shot, and so trinket by trinket, room by room, she and her helper, Gabriela, sorted, threw out, gave away, and boxed up most of our belongings in neat piles in the garage. We just needed the final paperwork to go through.
But as we waited, the screening committee asked for more and more documents. What seemed like a slam dunk now grew more and more complicated. Our assets were not the problem, we were told that the qualification was income-based, and we had little salary-based income. The problem, in their eyes, was the tremendous blessings from you, our friends and family. It was unthinkable to them, even suspect, that we had such an outpouring of loving support from the Family of God. Because God moved so many of you to give to us in our time of need, they decided to count your sacrificial gifts as income. Thus, we were disqualified because we were too blessed! Praise God. God has been using you to keep us afloat, and we are so grateful.
Long story short…ish, we’re not moving after all. We have to trust that God loves us and wants the best for us. Maybe it was all a test? We don’t know. All we know is that His love is our anchor. We look forward to what’s next. Special thanks to those who volunteered to help us move to our new place.
Well, what can I learn from this roller coaster ride?
1. We need to hold blessings lightly. During this Thanksgiving season, it is commonplace to thank God for all His material blessings. That is good, but His greatest blessings are always spiritual in nature, not only material. When we were faced with the challenge of letting go of our house of 11 years, the logistics of how to get rid of all our stuff was a major obstacle. David Jeremiah talks about “traveling light.” How wonderful would it be if we weren’t shackled down to things and thus free to do whatever God wanted, whenever He called us to do it. Most of us suburbanites have way too many bills, obligations, and unnecessary attachments that keep us from running our race with all the strength we have. When we stand before God, I believe many of us will regret all the wasted money, energy, and time we spent on matters trivial in the light of eternity. Hebrews 12 says, “let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.” Are we running the race God has set before us, or some other race?
2. Trust in the Dreamgiver, even when the dream seems to die. Joseph in the Bible had a dream from God at the tender age of 17. But did God bring that dream to pass right away? First, Joseph had to be betrayed by his brothers, sold into slavery, removed from home, accused of a crime he didn’t commit, spent time in prison, altogether waiting almost 30 years until his dream finally came to pass. Are you facing a momentary disappointment; a confusing, even bewildering series of events that tempts you to question God and His love for you? Is there a long-cherished dream of yours that seems to have died before your eyes? If that dream is from God, hold on. The one who gave you that dream is faithful to bring it to pass. God answers prayers in three ways: “Yes, No, and Not Yet.” “Not yet,” doesn’t mean, “Not ever.” Galatians 6:9 says, “So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.“ Hold on, my friend, and put your hope where it belongs, in the hand of God.